When I got married I used the trousseau as my excuse to shop with wanton abandon. I am in general frivolous but armed with an excellent excuse for my reckless spending there was no stopping me, actually when it comes to shopping there has never been any stopping me. So a fortnight before our engagement I was in Jakarta for work and used that opportunity to shop as much as my dad and my husband-to-be and I could collectively afford. When I am shopping, I am quite particular about what I’d like to buy, most often then not, what I like is totally and utterly unaffordable.

For my wedding I wanted a watch that had a big dial, but not too big, a golden belt but not too golden, basically something that looked elegant and not too ornate.  I had a very clear picture in my head of the watch but had still not found it. Basically amongst all the watches I saw I never found what I was looking for, either they were too shiny or too big or too ornate, until of course one day while window shopping in Jakarta I came face to face with a beauty that I thought was only in my head. I gingerly entered the showroom, quietly pointed towards that beauty and tried it on. It was exactly what I wanted; it matched to the tee with the picture I had in my mind, I was ecstatic to have finally found it, until of course…….. I turned to look at the price and gulped. I very very carefully took it off, put it back and ran away from the shop, as fast as I could. I decided to forget about it but it haunted me for days, but I knew I just couldn’t afford it, so well, I turned my attention on the other piece of jewelry that I was very clear about and still hadn’t found; the engagement ring.

I am crazy about diamonds, yes I know they have no intrinsic value and the lust that women have for them is an outcome of some bat shit crazy marketing strategies but the heart wants what the heart wants and mine wanted a solitaire in white gold. I had still not recovered from the sorrow of having to let go of the watch that was made for me and was treading carefully in a mall when I saw it, There it was, b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l; so beautiful that it literally did take my breath away. When I tried it, it sang to me. I am not being poetic here; it really did sing to me, I had to take this one home. The engagement ring was going to be paid for by the lover boy who was soon to be my husband. I quickly called him and in a very gibberish, dizzy and excited voice crooned about finally finding the ring for me.

Upon hearing the price he flatly refused. Now now, I had already been on the this-is-what-you-want-but-can-never-afford trip for the watch I was not under any circumstances going to give up on the ring too. What followed was a series of fights and boy can I fight, but the lover boy just won’t relent and boy can he fight back. Finally I had an idea, for our honeymoon we were doing two trips, one to the mountains because I am an earth person and one to the beach because he is a water person. So I told the lover boy he could cancel one part (obviously the water part) of the honeymoon and buy me the ring instead. On the grounds that I was clearly delirious to even suggest cancelling a part of the honeymoon for a ring the lover boy still did not relent. So well, I had to take the this-is-what-you-want-but-can-never-afford trip for the ring too. I have seen too many solitaires before and after that one, but none of them sang to me, sigh.

So anyways, the lover boy got me a ring that suited his pockets. Our engagement was 3 days before our wedding and after the wedding we waltzed away to our double honeymoon, which turned out to be a double trouble honeymoon because we missed our flights to Bali and had to rebook our tickets and we ended up paying a whole lot of money for that, money that was enough to have bought me the ring.

Maybe I shall post someday about the whole honeymoon fiasco but coming to the point of the post, if the lover boy had relented and cancelled the Bali trip for my ring, today I’d be wearing the ring and we’d have been to Bali with the money we had to shell when we missed our flights. That way we’d both be happy. I wonder if there is a statutory period after which husbands can go scot-free for all the pain they cause, but even if there is, my husband sure will pay very dearly for this one. Grrrrr.